Improving your mental wellbeing is key to a successful and fulfilling life, especially in today’s fast-paced world. However, with an overwhelming amount of advice available, it can be challenging to discern what truly helps and what hinders your progress. Drew Povey, a leadership expert and inspirational speaker from Warrington, highlights six common mistakes people make when trying to improve their mental health. Recognizing and avoiding these pitfalls can significantly boost your journey towards better mental wellbeing.
1. Over-Personalizing the Problem
One of the first and most common mistakes is making difficulties excessively personal. When faced with a challenge, it’s easy to let it dominate your thoughts and define your sense of self. Povey advises against allowing problems to become all-consuming.
Why This Happens
- Emotional Investment: When we’re emotionally invested in a problem, it feels like a direct reflection of our worth or capabilities.
- Rumination: Dwelling on the issue can make it seem larger and more central to our identity than it is.
How to Avoid It
- Recognize Universality: Remind yourself that you’re not alone. Many people face similar struggles.
- Externalize the Problem: Instead of saying “I am a failure,” try “I am experiencing failure in this situation.”
- Seek Perspective: Talk to someone you trust who can offer an outside view.
2. Allowing Pervasive Thoughts to Overtake You
Another frequent mistake is allowing an issue to color your perception of everything else in your life. When something is bothering you, it can feel like you’re viewing the world through a distorted lens, even when the problem isn’t directly related to other aspects of your life.
Why This Happens
- Negative Bias: Our brains tend to focus more on negative experiences, making them seem more significant.
- Anxiety: Anxious thoughts can generalize, making you feel uneasy about unrelated situations.
How to Avoid It
- Separate Issues: Consciously try to separate the problem from other areas of your life. Ask yourself if the issue is genuinely relevant in the current context.
- Mindfulness: Practice mindfulness to stay present and avoid letting one issue contaminate your overall outlook.
- Cognitive Restructuring: Challenge negative thoughts and reframe them in a more balanced way.
3. Assuming the Issue is Permanent
Believing that a problem is permanent can lead to feelings of hopelessness and despair. It’s crucial to remember that life is full of ups and downs and that most issues, unless very severe, are temporary.
Why This Happens
- Emotional Intensity: When you’re in the midst of a difficult situation, it can feel like it will never end.
- Past Experiences: Previous negative experiences can create a belief that problems are recurring and unavoidable.
How to Avoid It
- Recognize the Temporary Nature of Problems: Remind yourself that “this too shall pass.” Life comes in waves, and situations change.
- Focus on Solutions: Instead of dwelling on the problem’s permanence, concentrate on finding solutions or coping strategies.
- Set Realistic Expectations: Understand that setbacks are a normal part of life and don’t signify permanent failure.
4. Expecting Perfection
The pursuit of perfection, often magnified by social media, can be detrimental to mental health. Social media often presents an idealized version of reality, leading people to strive for unattainable standards.
Why This Happens
- Social Comparison: Social media encourages constant comparison with others, leading to feelings of inadequacy.
- Unrealistic Standards: The curated content on social media sets unrealistic expectations for success, appearance, and happiness.
How to Avoid It
- Focus on Progress: Shift your mindset from perfection to progress. Celebrate small achievements and learn from setbacks.
- Limit Social Media Use: Reduce the amount of time you spend on social media to minimize exposure to unrealistic portrayals of life.
- Practice Self-Compassion: Be kind to yourself and accept that mistakes are a part of growth.
5. Neglecting Self-Care
Self-care is often overlooked but is essential for maintaining mental health. Neglecting your physical and emotional needs can lead to burnout and exacerbate mental health issues.
Why This Happens
- Busy Schedules: People often prioritize work, family, and other commitments over their own wellbeing.
- Guilt: Some may feel guilty about taking time for themselves, viewing it as selfish.
How to Avoid It
- Prioritize Self-Care: Schedule regular self-care activities, just as you would any other important appointment.
- Identify Your Needs: Determine what activities help you relax and recharge, whether it’s exercise, reading, spending time in nature, or pursuing a hobby.
- Set Boundaries: Learn to say no to commitments that drain your energy and protect your time for self-care.
6. Failing to Seek Support
Many people struggle in silence, hesitant to seek help from others. Whether it’s due to stigma, fear of judgment, or a belief that they should handle things on their own, failing to seek support can prolong suffering.
Why This Happens
- Stigma: Mental health stigma can make people feel ashamed or embarrassed to seek help.
- Fear of Judgment: Some worry about being judged or misunderstood by others.
How to Avoid It
- Recognize the Importance of Support: Understand that seeking help is a sign of strength, not weakness.
- Reach Out to Trusted Individuals: Talk to friends, family members, or mentors who can provide a listening ear and offer advice.
- Seek Professional Help: Consider therapy or counseling to address underlying issues and develop coping strategies. Resources like NHS Talking Therapies offer free, confidential treatments.
Additional Tips for Boosting Mental Wellbeing
Beyond avoiding these common mistakes, there are several proactive steps you can take to improve your mental health.
- Practice Gratitude: Take time each day to appreciate the good things in your life.
- Stay Active: Regular physical activity can boost your mood and reduce stress.
- Connect with Others: Spend time with friends and family and build strong social connections.
- Get Enough Sleep: Aim for 7-9 hours of quality sleep each night.
- Eat a Healthy Diet: Nourish your body with nutritious foods that support brain health.
By being mindful of these common mental health mistakes and incorporating positive habits into your daily life, you can significantly improve your overall wellbeing. Remember, taking care of your mental health is an ongoing process, and seeking support when needed is a sign of strength.
